You’d love to make more time for yourself but your schedule just won’t allow it.
When it comes to time management, many of us are under the impression that we need more hours in the day in order to have any “me” time. But the truth is, managing your time has less to do with the hours in your day, and more to do with how you choose to spend that time.
So if you’d like to make more time for yourself, you need to make yourself a priority. Now, of course, that’s easier said than done. We all have personal and professional obligations, and people who need us. But, there are always going to be competing demands on your time, and you simply cannot make everyone’s priority your priority. If you did, you’d risk burning out or even start resenting all the people in your life for taking up your free time.
Try to imagine what your life would look like if you did have more time for yourself.
Making more time for yourself can mean…
- Setting aside time to work on your big projects, like finally sitting down to write your novel, planting a garden, or organizing your garage
- Carving out time for self-care activities and rituals, like lighting a special candle and writing in a journal
- Going out on a long run to clear your head
- Make something with your hands
- Zoning out and not thinking about anything or anyone else
When you make more time for yourself, you are doing good things for your health, your mind, and your future. Here are some tips on how to actually make time for yourself.
Replace “I should” with “I want”
I should work on an upcoming presentation. I should check in on a loved one who’s been having a hard time. I should do this or that. If you find yourself constantly saying “I should…,” then you’re going to have a hard time making time for the things you actually want to do.
“I should” often comes from a place of guilt or shame. We feel guilty for not being there for our coworkers or loved ones. We feel shame for wanting to pursue our creative activities instead of doing something “valuable” with our time. So if you’re struggling with a case of the “I shoulds” then try replacing them with “I want” statements.
“I want” gets to the heart of what you truly want to do. Ask yourself: If I took other people’s opinions or feelings out of the picture, then what would I want to do with my free time?
Here are some examples to help you come up with your own “I want” statements:
I should see if my friend needs help with her project.
But what I really want is to take a long walk in the park. I’ve had a tough day and I need to decompress.
I should check-in with my team at work.
But what I really want is to enjoy this meal that I’ve made for myself. My team will be perfectly fine without my input for one night.
I should read the newspaper and catch up on current events.
But what I really want is to read this novel that I’ve been meaning to read.
Cordon off your free time
When it comes to managing your time, it helps to get really granular and specific. You can’t just say “I want more free time.” That’s too nebulous and hard to measure. And when things are vague, they’re really easy to abandon. It’s easy to convince yourself, “I’m too busy. I don’t have any free time this week.”
If you want to make more time for yourself, then you need to spell it out. How much free time do you want? What days and times are you going to block off? Be sure to actually schedule and mark down this free time in your calendar or planner.
Example: I will block off Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays from 12pm-1pm to work on my dream project.
Then, at the end of the week, hold yourself accountable by checking to see if you really did commit to those blocks of free time.
Carry around a list of things to do with your free time
You finally have some free time in your schedule, but you have no idea how to spend it. And by the time you finally do come up with an idea, your free time has passed.
To make the most of your free time, write down a list of things to do beforehand.
You might’ve heard the saying: the human brain makes for a bad assistant. Your brain has a lot of information to process, and it’s not going to remember every single thing that’s important to you. If you really want something to stick, write it down on a list.
Examples of what to do with your free time can include: going for a hike, taking a long walk in your favorite park, slipping into cozy pajamas and sipping coffee, baking a cake, or reading a library book.
Carry this list around with you at all times. Keep it in your purse. Fold it inside your planner. Tape it over your desk.
This way, you’ll never be at a loss of what to do with your free time. And you’ll be less likely to spend your precious free time scrolling through your phone to find something to do or be tempted to do something for someone else. So the next time you have time to spare, go through your list and do something for yourself.
Set aside 10-15 minutes of downtime
There are some days when we simply cannot squeeze any free time out of our schedule. Work is really busy. Or the kids are home sick. Everyone is demanding your attention.
On those days when things are crazy, see if you can at least find 10-15 minutes to make some time for yourself. And do a small, but pleasant activity that will help you relax or feel rejuvenated.
So if you only have 10 minutes to spare, then make a cup of apple spiced tea so that it fills your home with a lovely aroma. Or put on a sheet mask and zone out for 10 minutes. Or open a window and take in some fresh air. Or spritz your face with rose water spray to feel reinvigorated.
Downtime, even when it’s for 10 or 15 minutes, can make a big difference in your mood and energy levels.
Written by JiJi Lee